God's calling: its never about us

After I fearfully hit the "publish" button on my first posting here on Wednesday morning, I was shocked at the mix of emotions that overcame me. I felt scared, nervous, excited, committed (is that an emotion? Well, It is now..) joyful, hopeful, euphoric, but mostly scared for some reason.  So I decided to go on a run to help ease the anxiety and nerves that were flowing through me at a million miles an hour. Running is my outlet. It helps calm any bad feelings I have. It's the best prescription for ANYTHING, in my opinion. But that's a whole nother posting all together. So I took off for a run on this Wednesday afternoon and as it usually happens, God started speaking to me on my run.

To be more specific, God started revealing some things to me about what this blog is going to do. Some of those things I'm not yet ready to share, because I really don't think I can put into words what he was showing me (and its probably because I'm not supposed to yet), but there is one thing in particular that He showed me that I feel is important to talk about this early in the game: He showed me is that the relationship between us is going to get really intimate. We are going to get to know each other REALLY well.  In the least, you will get to know me really well.  It is my prayer that throughout this journey, I also get to know each of you better and better. We are building a community.  For whatever reason, you are being drawn to follow and read what I have to say. And if that' s the case I want to be fully open and honest with you from the get-go.

I want you all to hold me accountable to this relationship.  God is doing something here, and its sooo important that it keeps on going. No matter what. In order to maintain this, I need to be consistent and reliable to you. So I am committing to posting three blog entries per week. It has to be something that you can expect and trust in - like your morning newspaper flung on your doorstep every morning.  You know its going to be there to read with your cup of coffee. I pray that this blog ends up looking kind of like that in its own unique way.  That may sound silly, but I'm being totally serious. What is the point in me starting this with the intention of it being a blessing, if its no longer a blessing to you anymore because its unreliable?   I know that keeping this online journal/blog thing is going to be challenging and not so fun at times for me, but its not about me. Its never about us. Its always about God.  I read something about that last night in Follow me to Freedom. 

"I often have to remind myself that what I'm doing is God's work, not mine.  We have a God who enters the world through smallness --a baby refugee, a homeless rabbi, the lillies and the sparrows.  We have a God who values the little offering of a couple of coins from a widow over the megacharity of millionaires.  We have a God wo speaks through little people -- a stuttering spokesman named Moses; the stubborn donkey of balaam, a lying brothel owner named Rahab, an adulterous king named David, a ragtag bunch of disciples who betrayed, doubted and denied; and a convered terrorist named Paul." Pg. 61

History has proven that God uses the most seemingly insignificant of people to make the biggest impacts. But its never about us - it cant be.  Its always about God and His plan. We cannot take the fame or the glory. God doesn't seem to be a fan of that at all. We are simply his vessel, his hands and feet, to carry those blessings out. I feel like this is important to sit on for a moment.  He is showing me that through this avenue of writing it IS going to inspire others to dream bigger.  It IS going to encourage someone (hopefully many someone's) to boldly come to His thrown and pray for something insanely large with their mustard-seed sized faith and see it actually happen, it IS going to cause some to change the way they view God and how He can show up in their lives.  But, It has to remain about what He's doing and for me to remain consistent to just keep writing.

 Thats my accountability soapbox rant.

I want to leave you with the lyrics from my absolute favorite Jesus Culture song: Come Away. Its been stuck in my head for these past few days, and I definitely don't think its by coincidence. It just so happens to also be the song that launched our church 6 months ago. It beautifully describes God's heart for each of us (no one is excluded), and what He has in store for us if we just open our hearts to Him.  Its different than most worship songs Ive ever heard in that it is written/performed from God's perspective. A very unique and thought provoking song.  If you haven't listened to it, or if its been a while, I strongly encourage you to listen to it with expectation and really believe it.

Come away with Me, Come away with Me
It's never too late, it's not too late
It's not too late for you

I have a plan for you
I have a plan for you
It's gonna be wild
It's gonna be great
It's gonna be full of Me

Open up your heart and let Me in.


XOXO

Kathryn